Everyone can stop stressing and worrying. I know it's been on your mind a lot, but it's finally here. The Angry Whopper is back at Burger King. I couldn't be happier about it. I freaking love that burger. There's a Burger King by my house, and on the marquee it said The Angry Whopper is Back! I screamed it out to the world as well. Now, if McDonald's will bring back the McRib, we are in business. I think that would be my death row meal. An Angry Whopper, McRib, and a diet Coke.
So I realize I've been pretty ranty over the last few weeks. Everyone needs to let off steam, and I do it by criticizing food places. So this week I've got a few random thoughts that will help you understand a little more about the enigma wrapped up in a mystery wrapped up in a Twinkie that is me.
The vehicle that parks by me at work has a Pearl Jam license plate. I've always felt that was a little strange. Every time I see the owner of the car I want to ask her about it. I want to know the thought process behind it. Was her love for Pearl Jam so strong that it couldn't be contained by just listening to the music or maybe wearing a Pearl Jam t-shirt? Instead, this was such an extreme love that she needed to contact the State of Utah to have them create this piece of metal that she put on her car that she paid $30,000 for to make sure the whole world knows that she loves Pearl Jam. Don't get me wrong, I like Pearl Jam a lot. I actually think they're better than Nirvana, but I think Nirvana is overrated. I just think it's a strange thing to do.
I thought this until yesterday. A truck cut me off cause it's Utah and that's what trucks do in Utah, and he had a Pearl Jam license plate. I'm probably the only person ever that has seen two different cars with Pearl Jam license plates. Then that got me thinking that maybe I'm the crazy one. Maybe these two are the sane ones because they want everyone to know of their love for this mid 90's band. So, maybe it's time for me to put my favorite band on a license plate. I'm not sure if the Doodle Town Pipers will fit on the plate, but I'll contact the State of Utah to find out.
Mirinda was surprisingly not scared of the Easter Bunny. On Christmas Eve I couldn't get her to fall asleep until about 2 AM cause she was so scared Santa was going to come in the room. Both of them loved getting in their Easter dresses. They got some new Sofia the First pajamas, and a microphone on a stand that amplifies their voice. They probably spent 3 or 4 hours playing with it until Mirinda broke it, but it's been returned and a new one procured.
I saw the new trailer for Star Wars, and it made me want to believe again, but I've been hurt before. Episode 8 was such an epic piece of garbage that part of me doesn't want to believe Episode 9 will be good, but part of me does. Honestly if they had brought Jar Jar back in Episode 8 it probably would have made the movie better. I like JJ Abrams, but I don't love everything he does, and as long as they don't go to Marvel I think it will be good. Here's hoping.
The Joker trailer however looks super dark and amazing. It's probably going to get an R rating, but I hope not.
I bought a smoker. I'm pretty stoked about it. If you want to come over for dinner and supply the meat, let me know.
Priya's hip replacement surgery is in a few weeks. I don't think I've ever had such a strong feeling of wanting to take this away from her. If there is any way we could get out of it I would. I know the pain she's going to go through in an already pain filled life, and it absolutely kills me. It will come and go though, and she'll be better off for it. I'm glad she doesn't really understand what's going to happen to her, because the fear would make it worse. She'll get through it, and all will be well. I just wish we were on the other end of it.
Just remember that things aren't as bad as they seem. We have a tremendous amount to be thankful for. That's not intended for a guilt trip. It is intended to get us to look on the bright side. There is so much good in the world, the bad just tends to be louder. Cheer up! Get out and do the things you know you need to do so you can enjoy the things you want to do more. There's not secret to it. It's just to be up and doing. Yes it's hard sometimes. That's OK. You'll have a day where you struggle. Go ahead and struggle. Just don't keep struggling. Make the changes you need to overcome, and it will get better.
Thanks for reading!
Thursday, April 25, 2019
Thursday, April 18, 2019
So much food, so little time
I'm eating a Lehi Bakery doughnut as I write this, and realizing how right I was. It truly is the number one doughnut in Utah. I appreciate the feedback on doughnut places. Daylight donuts is like the jeep of the doughnut world. It's not bad, it's really just a doughnut for getting around, so they didn't get on the list. I do think I'd revise my list to take Donut Boy off the list and put Billy B's Donuts on the list. It's not that Donut Boy is bad, it's just that Billy B's is amazing. However, the one in Midvale is shut down until May 1st for new management, which worries me. Let's all light a candle for Billy B's.
I've decided to buy a smoker. I like to get into different types of cooking and learn everything I can about it. On Sunday I decided to smoke a pork shoulder. I have a little infrared grill, and it said you can put the wood chips right on the grill and cook the meat. I did it and it was freaking amazing meat, so it's motivated me to buy a smoker.
Mirinda and Priya really liked the pork as well, but Amy told them it was pork butt. That's the name for it (they used to be stored in barrells called butts, so that's why a pork butt is pork shoulder). The girls thought that was the funniest thing ever, and they couldn't stop giggling while they ate. Priya picked up a piece of meat and started hitting it saying she was spanking the pigs butt. It's never dull with those two weirdos around.
On Monday I went to Vegas with my buddy Jim Bob. We had been planning this trip since last September, but things always came up, so we finally planned it and went. We flew down on Monday, and flew back on Tuesday, and the whole point of the trip was to find new places to eat. We looked on Youtube, but again it's a wretched hive of scum and villainy. One guy said his number one place to go was Hash House a Go Go. Here's the thing about that place. A lot of TV shows have gone there, and they've got a reputation as being this amazing place. It's really really mediocre. I've eaten there 3 times and I want to love it each time. I started out with the corn beef hash, and honestly I make a much better corn beef hash. If you're a hash house, that shouldn't be the case. I tried their chicken and waffles, very meh. Yes, the portions are huge, but just because they have huge portions doesn't mean they're good. The biscuits at Black Bear Diner are enormous, but they are the worst biscuits I've ever had. Every time I go in there I want to bring a home made regular sized biscuit with me and tell them to try it, because this is what a biscuit should taste like, not the cardboard they're trying to feed me.
We had some really excellent food on the Strip. The first place we stopped was the Park MGM. It's right next to New York New York, and it's a food court, but a really nice food court. It's basically a bunch of small open air restaurants. We had wild boar sausage with an amazing mustard and maldon salt. Really really fantastic food. We then went to The Cosmopolitan. It's right next to the Aria. There we ate at a similar food court at a place called Donuts Sliders and Brews. Had a Key Lime doughnut, a fried chicken slider and a pork belly slider. All were absolutely fantastic. The fried chicken slider had a spicy coleslaw on it, and the pork belly slider had pickled onions. There were a ton of other places there that we wanted to try, but needed to keep going.
We ate at the Ketchup Premium Burger Bar in the Miracle Mile shops. It was good. Had a burger with a hot dog and sauerkraut on top of it. The toppings were good, the burger was OK. The meat wasn't seasoned properly and it was well done, but I'd give that place another shot.
We then walked down to the Venetian and went to the Black Tap. They have these huge shakes there. They are expensive, about $17 each, but really unique and fantastic. The one we got was the sweet and salty, which had peanut butter ice cream, two pretzels, peanut butter cups, M&M's around the side of the glass, and a sugar daddy stuck in the middle. Excellent all around. They have one that has a piece of cake on top, and another that has a strawberry poptart on top. I highly recommend it.
By this point we were full, so we walked back to the hotel, just taking in the sights. I like the strip for about a day, and this time I wasn't pushing a wagon full of kids around. The next morning we went to the Aria breakfast buffet. Jim Bob fought me on it, but now he agrees with me that I'm always right on food. It is seriously the most amazing breakfast buffet. You can get boring stuff like pancakes and waffles, but you can also get so many other things, and it's all extremely tasty. I highly recommend it for breakfast.
We did a little more walking around, and then headed back to the airport and went home. It was a fantastic adventure. If you're planning a trip down there anytime soon, I'd definitely recommend any of those places.
The girls were very happy when I came home. Priya cried because I wasn't there to brush her teeth. I brought them a bunch of presents from Vegas, but they were the most happy with the pen and pad of paper I took from my hotel room. Good to know for next time. I did bring them a box of Chicken Poop, which is basically chocolate covered cookie dough pieces, but they thought that was pretty great. Now I spend each day telling them we don't really eat poop. I hope it sticks.
As always thanks for reading! If you have a place in Vegas you like to go let me know. If it's a $5 prime rib I'll probably mock you. Again, bigger does not always mean better.
I've decided to buy a smoker. I like to get into different types of cooking and learn everything I can about it. On Sunday I decided to smoke a pork shoulder. I have a little infrared grill, and it said you can put the wood chips right on the grill and cook the meat. I did it and it was freaking amazing meat, so it's motivated me to buy a smoker.
Mirinda and Priya really liked the pork as well, but Amy told them it was pork butt. That's the name for it (they used to be stored in barrells called butts, so that's why a pork butt is pork shoulder). The girls thought that was the funniest thing ever, and they couldn't stop giggling while they ate. Priya picked up a piece of meat and started hitting it saying she was spanking the pigs butt. It's never dull with those two weirdos around.
On Monday I went to Vegas with my buddy Jim Bob. We had been planning this trip since last September, but things always came up, so we finally planned it and went. We flew down on Monday, and flew back on Tuesday, and the whole point of the trip was to find new places to eat. We looked on Youtube, but again it's a wretched hive of scum and villainy. One guy said his number one place to go was Hash House a Go Go. Here's the thing about that place. A lot of TV shows have gone there, and they've got a reputation as being this amazing place. It's really really mediocre. I've eaten there 3 times and I want to love it each time. I started out with the corn beef hash, and honestly I make a much better corn beef hash. If you're a hash house, that shouldn't be the case. I tried their chicken and waffles, very meh. Yes, the portions are huge, but just because they have huge portions doesn't mean they're good. The biscuits at Black Bear Diner are enormous, but they are the worst biscuits I've ever had. Every time I go in there I want to bring a home made regular sized biscuit with me and tell them to try it, because this is what a biscuit should taste like, not the cardboard they're trying to feed me.
We had some really excellent food on the Strip. The first place we stopped was the Park MGM. It's right next to New York New York, and it's a food court, but a really nice food court. It's basically a bunch of small open air restaurants. We had wild boar sausage with an amazing mustard and maldon salt. Really really fantastic food. We then went to The Cosmopolitan. It's right next to the Aria. There we ate at a similar food court at a place called Donuts Sliders and Brews. Had a Key Lime doughnut, a fried chicken slider and a pork belly slider. All were absolutely fantastic. The fried chicken slider had a spicy coleslaw on it, and the pork belly slider had pickled onions. There were a ton of other places there that we wanted to try, but needed to keep going.
We ate at the Ketchup Premium Burger Bar in the Miracle Mile shops. It was good. Had a burger with a hot dog and sauerkraut on top of it. The toppings were good, the burger was OK. The meat wasn't seasoned properly and it was well done, but I'd give that place another shot.
We then walked down to the Venetian and went to the Black Tap. They have these huge shakes there. They are expensive, about $17 each, but really unique and fantastic. The one we got was the sweet and salty, which had peanut butter ice cream, two pretzels, peanut butter cups, M&M's around the side of the glass, and a sugar daddy stuck in the middle. Excellent all around. They have one that has a piece of cake on top, and another that has a strawberry poptart on top. I highly recommend it.
By this point we were full, so we walked back to the hotel, just taking in the sights. I like the strip for about a day, and this time I wasn't pushing a wagon full of kids around. The next morning we went to the Aria breakfast buffet. Jim Bob fought me on it, but now he agrees with me that I'm always right on food. It is seriously the most amazing breakfast buffet. You can get boring stuff like pancakes and waffles, but you can also get so many other things, and it's all extremely tasty. I highly recommend it for breakfast.
We did a little more walking around, and then headed back to the airport and went home. It was a fantastic adventure. If you're planning a trip down there anytime soon, I'd definitely recommend any of those places.
The girls were very happy when I came home. Priya cried because I wasn't there to brush her teeth. I brought them a bunch of presents from Vegas, but they were the most happy with the pen and pad of paper I took from my hotel room. Good to know for next time. I did bring them a box of Chicken Poop, which is basically chocolate covered cookie dough pieces, but they thought that was pretty great. Now I spend each day telling them we don't really eat poop. I hope it sticks.
As always thanks for reading! If you have a place in Vegas you like to go let me know. If it's a $5 prime rib I'll probably mock you. Again, bigger does not always mean better.
Friday, April 12, 2019
Love yourself a little more
As much as I hate winter, I don't mind these little winter storms that much, because it will be warm soon. One great thing about spring is spring cleaning. I love spring cleaning. I love getting rid of stuff we don't use. We've had a bunch of our stuff in storage since moving out of the house, and I've started going through all of it and asking if we've missed it in the last two years. If we haven't missed it, it goes to DI. It feels so good to get rid of crap we don't need. Now I need to start going through my clothes, because I have a ridiculous amount of clothes I don't wear anymore.
Here's the problem with spring. Road construction. I talked to a guy once that was on a road crew, and he talked about how hard it was to keep up with the roads in Utah because of our climate. I get that. We might have all four seasons in one day.
That being said, I'm convinced that UDOT is a 6th grade class project, and they're getting a D+ on it. Look at the intersection at I-15 and 12300 south. There is no way a competent adult came up with that. That was a 6th grader who thought it would be hilarious to make people go in the wrong direction to go in the right direction. And you know how hard it is to get east and west in the valley? Well let's make sure every road going east to west is under construction. It was the bully of the 6th grade class that came up with that idea. This week they're starting construction on Redwood Road. So on Tuesday they set up a ridiculous amount of barrels on Redwood, then on Wednesday took them all down, then on Thursday set them all back up again. You can't turn left now, and this is from 9000 south to 12600 south. Instead of setting up barrels for a small section, let's shut down an entire road for miles, and then wonder why everyone hates us. The only logical explanation is a 6th grade class project. D+. I get that construction needs to happen, but why not coordinate? 7800 south is now under construction from Redwood to Bangerter. Why not shut it down from Redwood to 2200 west, finish that section, then move up? Why shut down the entire freaking road? Other states get it and do it that way. Why not us? Then on Redwood there are multiple no left turn signs, but there's still some moron in a truck trying to turn left. I get that he's frustrated, but I also get that he should just stay home. He shouldn't be allowed on the roads. Also, let's go to Brazil to see how their roads work on the tax payers dime. Seriously UDOT. I know sometimes it's the cities that are doing the construction, but don't these guys have email? Can't they coordinate some of this stuff? End of rant.
Often we have carrier reps come in to talk about their new products, which is always good to know. The other day we had one come in and he said he'd bring breakfast in and asked us what we wanted. We said donuts. He was coming in at 10, so I didn't eat breakfast, and I was so excited to have a good doughnut. He brought in glazed Dunford donuts. First of all, Dunford is the worst doughnut in the world. I know there are people freaking out right now cause you think it's the best. It's not the best. It's the opposite of the best. It's not even a good trash doughnut. I can appreciate a good trash doughnut like I can appreciate a cheeseburger from McDonald's. It's doing the best it can with what it has. But no on Dunford. I have no idea how they have been around as long as they have. They are the absolute worst. And then to bring glazed in at that. When I was a bishop I banned Dunford donuts from all activities, because my stake was famous for having Dunford at every activity. Don't we love ourselves a little more than that? He almost didn't get our business for bringing in glazed Dunford donuts. He's a nice guy and the products were good or I would have thrown him out right then. Later in the week, we had another guy bring donuts, but these were Donuts and Deli donuts, and they are fantastic. He will definitely get out business from now on.
The time has come to start expecting more from our donuts, and to love ourselves a little more by not eating horribly crappy donuts. Seriously. Don't eat Dunford. Love yourself a little more than that. Dunkin Donuts is amazing everywhere else but Utah. For some reason here they are really not good. To help everyone start loving themselves a little more, I put together my top 5 doughnut list. These are the type of donuts that if you don't live near this doughnut place, you should drive there and get some.
1. Lehi Bakery: If you've never been there, you need to go. It's a little hole in the wall on Main Street in Lehi, but their glazed donuts are the most amazing donuts you will ever eat. I know I'm hyping them up, but they can stand up to the challenge. They're square donuts, which is different. They are so light and airy I can eat half a dozen without thinking about it, and be in a sugar filled heaven. If you haven't been there, go this weekend. They have other doughnuts that are really good too, just make sure you get the glazed.
2. Donuts and Deli: This is a little place on about 2600 South and State. These donuts are absolutely amazing. There's no one donut to try, they are just all good. Their chocolate on chocolate cake is probably my favorite. Very simple doughnut, but done amazingly well.
3. Banbury Cross: This is a Utah institution, but it's downtown so a lot of people don't know about it. It's on 700 East and about 900 South. The two to get there is the crumb doughnut and the strawberrry iced donut. There other doughnuts are good, but those two are the best. It's always hopping too, so there a lot of turnover, which you want in a doughnut place. Keeps them fresh.
4. Parsons Bakery: This is in Bountiful. I've never had a bad doughnut from there. They have other things as well, but really fantastic doughnuts.
5. Donut Boy: This is in West Valley on 3500 South and about 2200 West. This is a really inventive doughnut place. They do a lot of different flavor combinations, but it's not just toppings to cover up a bad doughnut. These are good doughnuts with different flavors. Definitely worth a try.
These are my top doughnut places. There are some honorable mentions, but they only have one thing going for them. Krispy Kreme are great, but only glazed when they're hot. Beyond Glazed is great, but I'm not paying $25 for a dozen glazed doughnuts. Get over yourself Beyond Glazed. My point with all this is to love yourself a little more, and if you're going to eat fried dough covered with sugar and fat for breakfast, make sure it's good fried dough covered with sugar and fat.
As always, thanks for reading! If I missed any doughnut places let me know, I either purposely left them off the list, or I haven't been there.
Here's the problem with spring. Road construction. I talked to a guy once that was on a road crew, and he talked about how hard it was to keep up with the roads in Utah because of our climate. I get that. We might have all four seasons in one day.
That being said, I'm convinced that UDOT is a 6th grade class project, and they're getting a D+ on it. Look at the intersection at I-15 and 12300 south. There is no way a competent adult came up with that. That was a 6th grader who thought it would be hilarious to make people go in the wrong direction to go in the right direction. And you know how hard it is to get east and west in the valley? Well let's make sure every road going east to west is under construction. It was the bully of the 6th grade class that came up with that idea. This week they're starting construction on Redwood Road. So on Tuesday they set up a ridiculous amount of barrels on Redwood, then on Wednesday took them all down, then on Thursday set them all back up again. You can't turn left now, and this is from 9000 south to 12600 south. Instead of setting up barrels for a small section, let's shut down an entire road for miles, and then wonder why everyone hates us. The only logical explanation is a 6th grade class project. D+. I get that construction needs to happen, but why not coordinate? 7800 south is now under construction from Redwood to Bangerter. Why not shut it down from Redwood to 2200 west, finish that section, then move up? Why shut down the entire freaking road? Other states get it and do it that way. Why not us? Then on Redwood there are multiple no left turn signs, but there's still some moron in a truck trying to turn left. I get that he's frustrated, but I also get that he should just stay home. He shouldn't be allowed on the roads. Also, let's go to Brazil to see how their roads work on the tax payers dime. Seriously UDOT. I know sometimes it's the cities that are doing the construction, but don't these guys have email? Can't they coordinate some of this stuff? End of rant.
Often we have carrier reps come in to talk about their new products, which is always good to know. The other day we had one come in and he said he'd bring breakfast in and asked us what we wanted. We said donuts. He was coming in at 10, so I didn't eat breakfast, and I was so excited to have a good doughnut. He brought in glazed Dunford donuts. First of all, Dunford is the worst doughnut in the world. I know there are people freaking out right now cause you think it's the best. It's not the best. It's the opposite of the best. It's not even a good trash doughnut. I can appreciate a good trash doughnut like I can appreciate a cheeseburger from McDonald's. It's doing the best it can with what it has. But no on Dunford. I have no idea how they have been around as long as they have. They are the absolute worst. And then to bring glazed in at that. When I was a bishop I banned Dunford donuts from all activities, because my stake was famous for having Dunford at every activity. Don't we love ourselves a little more than that? He almost didn't get our business for bringing in glazed Dunford donuts. He's a nice guy and the products were good or I would have thrown him out right then. Later in the week, we had another guy bring donuts, but these were Donuts and Deli donuts, and they are fantastic. He will definitely get out business from now on.
The time has come to start expecting more from our donuts, and to love ourselves a little more by not eating horribly crappy donuts. Seriously. Don't eat Dunford. Love yourself a little more than that. Dunkin Donuts is amazing everywhere else but Utah. For some reason here they are really not good. To help everyone start loving themselves a little more, I put together my top 5 doughnut list. These are the type of donuts that if you don't live near this doughnut place, you should drive there and get some.
1. Lehi Bakery: If you've never been there, you need to go. It's a little hole in the wall on Main Street in Lehi, but their glazed donuts are the most amazing donuts you will ever eat. I know I'm hyping them up, but they can stand up to the challenge. They're square donuts, which is different. They are so light and airy I can eat half a dozen without thinking about it, and be in a sugar filled heaven. If you haven't been there, go this weekend. They have other doughnuts that are really good too, just make sure you get the glazed.
2. Donuts and Deli: This is a little place on about 2600 South and State. These donuts are absolutely amazing. There's no one donut to try, they are just all good. Their chocolate on chocolate cake is probably my favorite. Very simple doughnut, but done amazingly well.
3. Banbury Cross: This is a Utah institution, but it's downtown so a lot of people don't know about it. It's on 700 East and about 900 South. The two to get there is the crumb doughnut and the strawberrry iced donut. There other doughnuts are good, but those two are the best. It's always hopping too, so there a lot of turnover, which you want in a doughnut place. Keeps them fresh.
4. Parsons Bakery: This is in Bountiful. I've never had a bad doughnut from there. They have other things as well, but really fantastic doughnuts.
5. Donut Boy: This is in West Valley on 3500 South and about 2200 West. This is a really inventive doughnut place. They do a lot of different flavor combinations, but it's not just toppings to cover up a bad doughnut. These are good doughnuts with different flavors. Definitely worth a try.
These are my top doughnut places. There are some honorable mentions, but they only have one thing going for them. Krispy Kreme are great, but only glazed when they're hot. Beyond Glazed is great, but I'm not paying $25 for a dozen glazed doughnuts. Get over yourself Beyond Glazed. My point with all this is to love yourself a little more, and if you're going to eat fried dough covered with sugar and fat for breakfast, make sure it's good fried dough covered with sugar and fat.
As always, thanks for reading! If I missed any doughnut places let me know, I either purposely left them off the list, or I haven't been there.
Thursday, April 4, 2019
Gym Troubles
I decided to start writing on Thursday because I make it a point not to get on social media on the weekends, and so people comment but I don't really respond for a few days, so I'm writing today.
Lagoon was magical. Well maybe not magical, but it was good to be back. I watched a mother screaming at her children while they were in line for Lady Bug Bop. Whenever I need to yell at my children, that's the place to do it. I get that sometimes kids are extremely frustrating, and sometime you yell. We all lose our cool sometimes. But seriously lady, stop yelling at your teenage son about his grades and sports as loud as you can in the Lady Bug Bop line. Save that conversation for the teacups.
The internet has made us a mean people I think. It was the first day at Lagoon, and for most of these kids it's their first job they've ever had, and it's their first day of their first job. It's terrifying. I remember my first day working at Burger King. It was horrible. I watched one lady order chicken nachos. They came out and she didn't feel like there was enough stuff on her chicken nachos, so she asked for everything on it, and they said that is everything. So she asked for lettuce, and when they put lettuce on her nachos she got mad at them. Seriously, everyone calm down. These first world problems aren't as bad as we think they are. I got the chips and queso because my girls love chips and cheese as they call it. It was a few broken chips with some cheese dumped on it. Not a great deal, but I tried it and now I know not to get it again. I should give a list of the foods to get at Lagoon. Some are really good, some not so much. I usually talk to random people in line and tell them where the best food is. Usually they're appreciative. Not always.
After the bike fiasco last week I had to get my man card back. On Monday the girls new power wheels came. It's a Wonder Woman power wheels jeep, and it's pretty awesome. It's not the Gal Gadot Wonder Woman unfortunately, but still pretty awesome. It comes in a box, and you have to set it up. That's a 3 hour process, and it's a lot of kneeling and trying not to swear. I did pretty good.
The girls love it because they can ride together. They giggle and chortle and it's adorable. However, it does make their personality come out. Priya is absolutely insane. She'll drive towards things with no intention of turning, and drive up onto the grass and peel out, all while laughing maniacally. Mirinda has anxiety while she is at the wheel. When it's Mirinda's turn to drive, she drives very well and turns the wheel when she should, until Priya decides that's lame and pushes her foot on top of the gas pedal. I think I know who is going to be getting to drive when they're 16 and who isn't. Granted, I hit someone purposely with my car at Taco Bell in high school. He told me to do it. He said drive at me really slowly and I'll roll up on your hood and it will look like you hit me and we'll impress these girls. So I did. He went right through my windshield. He was fine, but I'm lucky to be alive, cause my mom wanted to kill me.
The other way I'm trying to get my man card back is I set up a swing for the girls. We're looking for things that Priya can do while she's in the cast, so this swing has a flat seat they can lay down on. That only took 2 hours to set up, but the girls absolutely love it.
Yes, I really spoil my girls. I worry about that sometimes, but they're so appreciative of all of it. We waited so long for those girls I don't mind spoiling them. That's just me though.
Priya is starting to talk a lot which is fantastic considering she's only been speaking english for about a year. The only problem is I can't understand a big chunk of what she's saying. She's getting better, but still I don't understand her. Luckily I have Mirinda. She's become the interpreter. Priya will repeat something three times, and finally Mirinda will tell me what she said. The other day Priya was telling me something and Mirinda finally said, "She said the bourgeoisie mercilessly exploited the proletariat". I thanked her for that, and asked her how long they had been studying Marxism in preschool. She wasn't sure.
I need to talk about the building I work in. It's a good building. We used to work downtown, and I'm sorry but downtown is becoming a hole. I work for my mom, and once she saw a guy drop his pants and take a deuce in the planter box right in front of the entrance to our building, wipe himself with a leaf, and walk away. When you see something like that the charm of downtown is lost.
We work in Murray now, and it is a much better building and location, but there are some weird things. When we first moved in, they were remodeling the inside. It really needed it, but for some reason they painted all the tile primer blue. It literally looks like primer. It's like the painters have been on strike for 2 years, so we still have primer blue tiles. There's also a waterfall in the lobby for some reason. To me, the only reason to have a waterfall is to make wishes with coins, and my girls used to do that, but then they put a sign up saying we couldn't do that anymore. Lame.
The entrance to the building has two double doors. One side has a button to open the door automatically, and the building has gone nuts with it. People won't even walk through the other side of the doors because then they'd have to open the door and that's too much work. People will wait on the other side of the door for someone to go through, instead of walking through the door. This is how lazy we've gotten. I'm usually pretty polite to people who hold the door open for me, but if I have the right of way and the other person doesn't walk through the other door but waits for me to go through, I don't even say thank you anymore. Cause it's ridiculous.
Then there's the gym downstairs. I'm happy to report I still work out every day. The gym is down in the basement in the corner. Not many people go down there cause it kind of has a rapey vibe, but I don't care. What interests me are the people that do come in there and what is going on in their mind. One guy comes in to use the bathroom. The other day he was literally in there for 40 minutes. It was probably longer, but that's how long it took me to get changed, work out, and get changed again, and he still hadn't left. While I was changing out of my workout clothes he literally flushed the toilet 8 times in that two minutes. I had to start hurrying up because I was going to bust out laughing. He's been in there multiple times, just flushing away.
There's one guy that comes in basketball shorts, a tshirt and a hat. He comes in that way, meaning he comes to work that way. He comes in a few days a week, and his routine is to either do 5 situps, or to throw a medicine ball against a trampoline 5 times, and then he leaves. First of all I though medicine balls went extinct like 100 years ago. Second, I really want to know what is going through his mind. Does he think "Now that I did those five sit ups I can go have a banana split"? I really want to ask him.
There's another guy that comes in tight jeans and a long sleeve flannel shirt. He comes in, lifts a 10 pound weight, and does 10 reps with each arm, and then he's good. That's all the workout he needs. Again, I just want to know what is going on in these people's heads. Then I start to make up stories to amuse myself while I'm working out.
Saturday will be 4 years to the day that my Dad died. I miss him every day. I think the hardest thing now is knowing how much he would love Mirinda and Priya. I know he knows them, but I'd rather have him here. Sometimes life isn't fair.
It's National Burrito day, so go and get a burrito. Just not at Cafe Rio. Thanks for reading!
Lagoon was magical. Well maybe not magical, but it was good to be back. I watched a mother screaming at her children while they were in line for Lady Bug Bop. Whenever I need to yell at my children, that's the place to do it. I get that sometimes kids are extremely frustrating, and sometime you yell. We all lose our cool sometimes. But seriously lady, stop yelling at your teenage son about his grades and sports as loud as you can in the Lady Bug Bop line. Save that conversation for the teacups.
The internet has made us a mean people I think. It was the first day at Lagoon, and for most of these kids it's their first job they've ever had, and it's their first day of their first job. It's terrifying. I remember my first day working at Burger King. It was horrible. I watched one lady order chicken nachos. They came out and she didn't feel like there was enough stuff on her chicken nachos, so she asked for everything on it, and they said that is everything. So she asked for lettuce, and when they put lettuce on her nachos she got mad at them. Seriously, everyone calm down. These first world problems aren't as bad as we think they are. I got the chips and queso because my girls love chips and cheese as they call it. It was a few broken chips with some cheese dumped on it. Not a great deal, but I tried it and now I know not to get it again. I should give a list of the foods to get at Lagoon. Some are really good, some not so much. I usually talk to random people in line and tell them where the best food is. Usually they're appreciative. Not always.
After the bike fiasco last week I had to get my man card back. On Monday the girls new power wheels came. It's a Wonder Woman power wheels jeep, and it's pretty awesome. It's not the Gal Gadot Wonder Woman unfortunately, but still pretty awesome. It comes in a box, and you have to set it up. That's a 3 hour process, and it's a lot of kneeling and trying not to swear. I did pretty good.
The girls love it because they can ride together. They giggle and chortle and it's adorable. However, it does make their personality come out. Priya is absolutely insane. She'll drive towards things with no intention of turning, and drive up onto the grass and peel out, all while laughing maniacally. Mirinda has anxiety while she is at the wheel. When it's Mirinda's turn to drive, she drives very well and turns the wheel when she should, until Priya decides that's lame and pushes her foot on top of the gas pedal. I think I know who is going to be getting to drive when they're 16 and who isn't. Granted, I hit someone purposely with my car at Taco Bell in high school. He told me to do it. He said drive at me really slowly and I'll roll up on your hood and it will look like you hit me and we'll impress these girls. So I did. He went right through my windshield. He was fine, but I'm lucky to be alive, cause my mom wanted to kill me.
The other way I'm trying to get my man card back is I set up a swing for the girls. We're looking for things that Priya can do while she's in the cast, so this swing has a flat seat they can lay down on. That only took 2 hours to set up, but the girls absolutely love it.
Yes, I really spoil my girls. I worry about that sometimes, but they're so appreciative of all of it. We waited so long for those girls I don't mind spoiling them. That's just me though.
Priya is starting to talk a lot which is fantastic considering she's only been speaking english for about a year. The only problem is I can't understand a big chunk of what she's saying. She's getting better, but still I don't understand her. Luckily I have Mirinda. She's become the interpreter. Priya will repeat something three times, and finally Mirinda will tell me what she said. The other day Priya was telling me something and Mirinda finally said, "She said the bourgeoisie mercilessly exploited the proletariat". I thanked her for that, and asked her how long they had been studying Marxism in preschool. She wasn't sure.
I need to talk about the building I work in. It's a good building. We used to work downtown, and I'm sorry but downtown is becoming a hole. I work for my mom, and once she saw a guy drop his pants and take a deuce in the planter box right in front of the entrance to our building, wipe himself with a leaf, and walk away. When you see something like that the charm of downtown is lost.
We work in Murray now, and it is a much better building and location, but there are some weird things. When we first moved in, they were remodeling the inside. It really needed it, but for some reason they painted all the tile primer blue. It literally looks like primer. It's like the painters have been on strike for 2 years, so we still have primer blue tiles. There's also a waterfall in the lobby for some reason. To me, the only reason to have a waterfall is to make wishes with coins, and my girls used to do that, but then they put a sign up saying we couldn't do that anymore. Lame.
The entrance to the building has two double doors. One side has a button to open the door automatically, and the building has gone nuts with it. People won't even walk through the other side of the doors because then they'd have to open the door and that's too much work. People will wait on the other side of the door for someone to go through, instead of walking through the door. This is how lazy we've gotten. I'm usually pretty polite to people who hold the door open for me, but if I have the right of way and the other person doesn't walk through the other door but waits for me to go through, I don't even say thank you anymore. Cause it's ridiculous.
Then there's the gym downstairs. I'm happy to report I still work out every day. The gym is down in the basement in the corner. Not many people go down there cause it kind of has a rapey vibe, but I don't care. What interests me are the people that do come in there and what is going on in their mind. One guy comes in to use the bathroom. The other day he was literally in there for 40 minutes. It was probably longer, but that's how long it took me to get changed, work out, and get changed again, and he still hadn't left. While I was changing out of my workout clothes he literally flushed the toilet 8 times in that two minutes. I had to start hurrying up because I was going to bust out laughing. He's been in there multiple times, just flushing away.
There's one guy that comes in basketball shorts, a tshirt and a hat. He comes in that way, meaning he comes to work that way. He comes in a few days a week, and his routine is to either do 5 situps, or to throw a medicine ball against a trampoline 5 times, and then he leaves. First of all I though medicine balls went extinct like 100 years ago. Second, I really want to know what is going through his mind. Does he think "Now that I did those five sit ups I can go have a banana split"? I really want to ask him.
There's another guy that comes in tight jeans and a long sleeve flannel shirt. He comes in, lifts a 10 pound weight, and does 10 reps with each arm, and then he's good. That's all the workout he needs. Again, I just want to know what is going on in these people's heads. Then I start to make up stories to amuse myself while I'm working out.
Saturday will be 4 years to the day that my Dad died. I miss him every day. I think the hardest thing now is knowing how much he would love Mirinda and Priya. I know he knows them, but I'd rather have him here. Sometimes life isn't fair.
It's National Burrito day, so go and get a burrito. Just not at Cafe Rio. Thanks for reading!
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